Watching the movie Don Jon stirred up a lot for me. Have you seen it? If not — and if you’re interested in seeing a well-done portrayal of how of internet porn affects young men these days — I recommend you watch it right away.
The movie is about a good-looking guy in his 20s who dates plenty of attractive women, but he has a compulsive relationship with porn. You could call him an addict: He masturbates in front of his laptop (with a large box of tissues nearby) several times a day.
Let’s stop here for just a second. I just love that a movie with a theme like this — one that directly addresses such a “taboo” sexual subject — made it out of the labyrinth that is Hollywood. God bless ‘Merica!
The reality is that giving teenagers and young adults unlimited access to free high-speed porn via the internet is like giving cocaine addicts free and unlimited supplies of their favorite drug. Before you call me crazy for making that comparison, current neuroscience has revealed that the same pathways in the brain’s pleasure center are used for both sex and addictive drugs!
Imagine this: You’re a teenager and those powerful surges of erotic energy are beginning to flow through your body. You turn to internet porn to gratify those urges. If you have a somewhat addictive personality, you might watch a few hours a day for several years. This can’t help but have a profound effect on your interactions with flesh-and-blood women. Not just in reduced confidence, but with effects like erectile dysfunction as well.
Back to the movie. The protagonist in Don Jon has created a mental composite of a woman who is a perfect “10” — in overall beauty, in specific parts of her anatomy, and in her sexual capabilities as well. Well then! Why bother with a real-life woman when she’ll never compare to your imagined ideal? Even the stunning Scarlett Johansson doesn’t measure up.
I strongly encourage guys who are starting my MultiOrgasmic Lover training to take a break from porn. Here’s why. MOL is designed to reacquaint men with their body’s natural arousal response, and if you’re immersed the training, you’ll find that avoiding the dopamine-jacking stimulus of pornography will get you the results you want much more quickly.
But even if you’re not engaged in my program, I’d like you to consider to take a break from high-speed internet porn regardless of your level of use. Focus instead on the sensations of pleasure in your own body, whether with yourself or when you’re with a partner.
Little by little, you start to reconnect with your true desire — a kind of internal hunger or longing that’s not based on external images. As you experience more and more of this delicious connection with yourself, you’re able to modulate your desire levels more easily. And as a result, you can last as long as you want.
Give this to yourself: Take a “porn fast” for a month — or 90 days, if you’re a hardcore user — and see if there’s a clear, positive change in your sex life at the end of the fast. I bet there will be.
And if you already own the MultiOrgasmic Lover training, now would be a good time to recommit to working through the modules and giving up porn.
Go for it!
